sitting, waiting, wishing

well... my birthday, my last day of work, isla's due date, and christmas have all come and gone.  as much as i was hoping to have a baby in my arms by this point, i can't say that i'm too surprised to still be waiting.

at my 40 week appointment last thursday, a somewhat callous and matter-of-fact midwife (who let's just say was NOT my favorite person ever) made it very clear that i wasn't even close.  i believe her exact words were "your cervix is completely closed and way up in the rafters."  (too much info?  sorry...)  later when i told her that i was staying in the area for the holidays, she said, "it doesn't really matter.  you're not going to go into labor and even if you do, you'd still have plenty of time to drive back here."  ummm, thanks.  i kind of wanted to claw her eyes out.  :-)

but the truth is that she was probably right.  and so we wait.  and wait.  and wait.  i know that this is extremely normal.  disappointing, but normal.

if i've learned anything over the past few years, it's that waiting is not such a bad thing.  i know that she will be worth it.  and while i'm waiting, i've been soaking up some extra special time with steve in our last few days or weeks as a family of two.  uncomfortable though i may be, i am enjoying this period of time...  i'm learning to love my husband a little deeper... express my gratefulness and appreciation a little more openly... and snuggle a little bit closer (as much as my jumbo belly will allow!).  :-)  perhaps God knew we needed this.

hope you all had a marvelous christmas!  here's to a truly life-changing new year!  :-)

countdown...

well, here i am at 38.5 weeks.  (remember a few months ago when i was so sad about how long it was taking for my belly to pop out?  now it looks like i'm trying to smuggle a basketball under my shirt...)  :-)

anyway, Little Miss Isla is due in just 11 DAYS.  i believe steve and i are about as ready as we're ever going to be!  here are a few stats...

• 5 DAYS until my 31st birthday (kind of forgot about my birthday this year... i'm just curious to find out if isla is going to have to share her birthday with her mama!)
• 4 MEALS in the freezer for after isla's arrival (hoping to make a few more if time permits...)
• 3 BAGS packed for the hospital for me, steve, and isla (pretty sure i over-packed, but i like to be prepared!)
• 2 WEEKS until christmas (so excited to see if this will be isla's first christmas!)
• 1 CAR SEAT safely installed in the back of my honda (i feel like such a grown up!)

in other news, i'd like to follow-up with last week's discussion about the possibility of an ECV.  we met with the doctor on tuesday to talk about the pros and cons of this procedure.  when we found out that there was only a 50% success rate and also the possibility of trauma / distress to the baby, steve and i really didn't feel comfortable going this route.  so we decided that a c-section would be a better option for me.  HOWEVER, it turns out that it was a moot point because on thursday i had another ultrasound, and it showed that isla had flipped herself around again!  she is now head-down, face-down, and ready to go!  so now we wait and hope that she stays in that position for the remainder of the pregnancy.  (apparently, she still has enough room in there to flip again, so they'll just keep a close eye on her.)

hope you all are enjoying the holiday season!  i know it will be life-changing for me and steve this year!  :-)

project nursery and other news

we have a nursery.  and not a moment too soon!  isla could very possibly arrive any day now, so i'm happy that her room is finally ready!

to appreciate the final product, you really need to see the "before" pictures.  previously, her room had been our junk room in every sense of the word.  yuck.

in order to transform the room into a nursery, we had to replace the drafty old windows, change the light fixture, prime everything (the previous paint had been oil based...), apply about 500 coats of paint (ok, maybe just three or four...), cry a lot and change my mind a lot and fight with the people at walmart about failed site-to-store deliveries (pregnancy = way too much drama for me!), and then finally pull it all together!  whew!

so here's the final product.  it doesn't really compare to the amazingly cool nurseries i've been scoping out on pinterest.com and other websites, but i like it and i think isla will feel right at home.  :-)

 i picked the general color palate, but steve settled on the final wall color.  good choice, steve!  :-)

the changing table is a reeeeeaally old dresser from my dad's side of the family.  i repainted it 6-7 years ago, having no idea that i'd one day use it for for this purpose!

in the near future, the hooks will be used for hanging little towels and whatnot... but for now, i just couldn't resist hanging a cute little sweater!

here is the corner opposite of the crib.  the rocking chair is the same one the my mom rocked me and my sister on as babies.  :-)

i painted the back of a bookshelf to match my colors.  easy-schmeasy update!  also, the stuffed animals all have a story behind them.  i love that i can pass them on to my little girl!

ideally, i'd still like to find an ottoman and side table for this corner of the room.  with my awesome photoshopping skills, you can see how this will look one day.  :-)

 in other news....

• prior to thanksgiving, isla had been head-down and ready for delivery.  however, at my appointment last week, the midwife discovered that she had flipped back around and is now breech.  (must have been all of that wonderful thanksgiving food!)  since i'm now at 37 weeks, we will be meeting with a doctor tomorrow to discuss options, which include an ECV (external cephalic version) or possibly a c-section.  or maybe she'll flip back around on her own!  we'll see...
• i know that breech = bad, but ever since she flipped into this position, i've been so much more comfortable!  so the relief is kind of nice.
• i now have exactly two pairs of pants that fit.  (and really, only one pair that fits well.)  dressing for the next few weeks could get interesting....
• i am unbelievably excited to meet my baby girl!!!  i continue to praise God for this miracle.

have a great week, friends!